Monday, 30 June 2008

Mama was real sad today.

She was reading words on the screen what is not the telly and she did a big cry, she said to Daddy that someone had thrown her favourite hoomin fur away that she'd only worn once and it was very expensive.... I didn't understand and I was too bust scoffing coriander to care anyway.

Daddy took her to a town called Milk And Cheese and bought her a dress, he said she looked like a beautiful butterfly princess. Pass the sick bucket! I know us bunnies have no gag reflex but I sure can pretend! She has to wear the dress to a wedding, a think where two hoomins get stuck together forever. Imagine that. What if one wants to go peepee but the other is watching the televisual box? What happens then?

I think it's funny how hoomins have no fur so they have to put replaceable fur on everyday. I am a bit jealous that it comes in all different colours though, I wish I could change colour. I would like to be blue.

But don't forget that Mama's legs are still nearly as furry as mine and as for Daddy, he has fur on his toes! How funny!

Because Mama did a cry today I felt bad for biting her yesterday. Yes, I bit Mama. I am a naughty bunny. Mama has been grooming my underside each day and yesterday I'd quite frankly had enough! So I bited her with my little teefs! She went "YEOWCH" and let me run away. She said it was very sore and today she showed me the bruise. I feel bad now.

I love Mama very much but I really do not like having my bumbum groomed!

Friday, 27 June 2008

I forgot to say why i'm in a grump!

Well, Mama has been chasing me around for days with a comb, I HATE it! I hate my bun being brushed but Mama said it's a ne-sess-itee because I am moulting. So what! I like moulting! The hairs get up Mama's nose and make her sneeze so, I can't help but laugh at her!

A-TISH-OO A-TISH-OO! she goes. I laugh because it's like a little bit of naughtiness without getting into trouble.

Mama caught me and held me tight tight tight to her and brushed inbetween my legs! How rude, she could have seen my dinkle if she wasn't careful! She got so much hair out before putting me down, even I was shocked! I do feel more light and airy down there now but it doesn't mean I'm going to enjoy it every time!

I had a big sulk in my crate afterwards. I feel okay now but I do feel like Mama is violating my bunny rights! That's my fur, what gives her the right to steal it and put it in the bin like it means nothing?! *thump*

Weel I've been very naughty and now I'm in a grump!

I know I promised to be a good boy but I just can't help it, I'm just tto much of a naughty monster at heart!

I entirely forgot where I was and what I was doing and - oopsie - I went piddly on the sofa! Stoopid Daddy tried to shoo me off the sofa which made me accidently spray some peepee up the back off the sofa. Mama was not best pleased and had to wash some of the sofa cover.

THEN 4 hours later I just couldn't help myself, I went pee again! Mama wasn't paying attention so I just let it all out, ahhhhhhh! It felt gooooood!

Mama had put down a fresh towel so she only grumbled a little ......... until a little while later I went peepee AGAIN! hahahahahahahhahahahahaha!! It took her an hour to clean the sofa properly and she was very cross and sent me to bed, booooo. I munched on hay and had a sleepy and pretended not to care.

Today Mama has put a new towel on the sofa, it was so soft and squashy, I couldn't help but do head binkies and happy flops! It was so fluffy I couldn't help but have a little sleepy, it was so nice. I did some more happy flops and a whole load of poops..... then I did a weewee! Mama went SPARE! And she said I was grounded and must go straight to bed! *thump*

She was saying "I don't know what's got into you lately young man, you've been really good just doing poops. Now you've let me down with all this wee in 24 hours" I pretended to be asleep so she thought I wasn't listening.

I was allowed out a little while later.....and you know what I did?! Can you guess?

Yes! I sneaked up and went peepee on the binbag "defence"!! I'm truely am a cheeky monster! Mama said it's a good job the binbag caught it all or i would have been marched down to the naughty bunneh's home to teach me a lesson. *shudder* I've heard of that place, it's dark and cold and a horrible lady keeps you in a tiny hutch and you get feed poor quality hay, museli mix (YUK!) and there's NO CORIANDER, THYME OR PARSLEY!!! Sounds terrible. There's no love or cuddles either.

I've decided I'm going to start being good again, I'm simply cannot go to the naughty bunnies home!



Kisses to all my bunneh and hoomin friends xx

Thursday, 26 June 2008

It's a hoomin's birthday!

Well, last night bunny words came on the wind through the window and into my ears, it was a message from Bobbin and Roo!

They said it was their hoomin mummy's birthday! She is a growed up hoomin. I got up on Mama's lap, gave her a kiss and whispered the news in her ear.

We got on the floor and made a little package of bunny and hoomin birthday kisses, we tied it in a pretty bow and we sent it on the wind back to Bobbin and Roo for when when Mummy Thea got up this morning. We do hope they remembered to give the package to her!

Today I got out of the wrong side of bed and I really wasn't in the mood for Mama making videos. I just wanted to enjoy my veggiebles!

I kept trying to hide myself away but she kept following so I gave her a flick of the feet to let her know to pack it in!

You can see it in this box with moving pictures in it -

Wednesday, 25 June 2008

Phew!

Blogger has been "unavailable" all day, I didn't think I would get to do a blog today, I've been worried about letting my fans down!

Well, today has been a lazy day, we didn't really get up to much. I wish I could go for more playtime at Uncle Richards. Maybe if I'm really good, Mama will let me go for a visit. I'm sure I will forget to be good by tomorrow but I really will try.

Mama dressed up real pretty earlier, she had silver shoes on that went clippity-clop. She drawed on her face with pencils and brushes and I helped her by choosing colours and telling her what looked nice. She has a face powder that smells like peaches, I like it when she puts that on, it makes me want to lick her face. But I won't, hoomins don't deserve grooming, especially not on their skin, eww!

Her and Daddy went for dinner with her hoomin Grandparents but was soon back for loves and squishes and cuddles. I decided that I'm not going to do any binkies this evening to show my disgust at not being invited for dinner too. I bet there was some nice carrot dishes on the menu too.

I've been doing my usual sofa poops, I've been trying my hardest not to pee on the sofa and I think I've managed nearly a week without going weewee on Betty Boop's face. Mama says she doesn't mind the poos, she just worries that it will lead to a wee. I like being on the sofa, it makes me do head binkies so Mama doesn't want to ban me because it makes me so happy.

Here is a fraction of what I usually do...















I did a really impressive poop, Mama even took a photo...















She said I needed a good brush as I am moulting again. Again! I'd only just finished my first moult! Mama says this one is happening much quicker. She gave me a good brush, I kept running away to give her something to do. I'm not really keen on having the brush on my rump so I run away and Mama pretends to be a bunny and hops after me.

She got all this out....















She says she is going to make a clone of me from all the shed fur, imagine that!

Well, I'm tired now and Mama is tired of holding me up to the keyboard so toodle pip for now!

Monday, 23 June 2008

I had some serious fun at Uncle Richard's!

Well, Mama had to get up early today to help Daddy take my crate across the road to Uncle Richard's... gosh, her face looks like crumpled paper in the mornings! I can't believe she even went outside, she hadn't even had a weewee or a wash, dirty hoomin!! As a refined youngbun, I at least wash my ears before emerging from my bedroom! Imagine if someone had seen her, I would have been soooo embarrassed!

Mama came back and wrapped me up in a big warm squashy cuddle under her hoodie and took me across the road. I was very brave, I don't go outside very often so i have to be a big boy to make Mama proud. She gave me some cawwit to tell me what a good boy I was. She gave me kisses kisses (YUK!!) and told me to be a good boy... at least i think that's what she said, I was much to busy dealing with all the new smells in my nose and sights in my eyes.

Anyways, I was feeling pretty lazy and had some hay time and some snoozy time and some smelling time. I even did some dancing at my very own disco.

















The time flew by and before I knew it Mama was back to get me! I was so excited that I did some binkies. Uncle Richard had some washing hanging up so i marked it all, I did some serious chinning on his speakers and tv cabinet and I jumped all over the sofas and was having a great time. Mama was panicking incase I piddled but I was having waaay to much fun for naughty weewee time!

I was running and jumping and doing head binkies galore, then Mama got the camera out...so I stopped. She thinks I'm some kind of performing seal! I mean, really! So I stood still and used my windscreen wiper ears to cover my eyes until she gave up.

Then I decided I would do something nice for Uncle Richard, I would do some cleaning! Lick, lick here, lick, lick there, I was licking just about everywhere. Mama found this very funny and I let her film me some. (see video!) Stooopid hoomin only filmed it sideways, didn't she?! Too much Ribena I think, it's her own fault, she should have shared that delicious juice with me!

video

So I'm home now and sure as pie, I save those poops for home!! I've been poopin' like a good 'un! I kept uncle Richard's carpet clean, Mama said she wishes I had such good manners at home, NAR NAR NA NAR NAR!!!

I just realised that i forgot to ask to see Uncle richard's car-pets. *thump* Does anyone know what car-pets are?

HELLO TO JANE!! Mama said you sorted out your broad beans and could read my stories now! I hope you like them!

Sunday, 22 June 2008

A-polly-geeez to my fans!

No update since wednesday, I'm so sowwee!!

I've been feeling a bit -



















It's a hard life being an Ethnic Bunneh, there's alot to do!

There was a storm last night, it was raining real bad and someone liked it so much they were taking pictures, I kept seeing the flash go off.

Today Mama has been running around like something she calls a "blue arsed fly" (what's one of them then?!) because she says that tomorrow she is having something called an "in-spek-shun". She said I have to MOVE OUT!! I nearly started crying but Mama said not to worry, I would only be visiting Uncle Richard's across the street for a few hours..... I wonder if he has any thyme and coriander. I like Uncle Richard's. Mama says he has car-pets. What sort of a pet is that? I never heared of a pet called a car-pet with my ears before.

We are going to Uncle Richard's in the morning and coming home in the afternoon. I wonder if Uncle Richard will play with me, he works funny hours so he should be around. He has stairs, I might try them out.

I did ask Mama why I couldn't stay, she said it is because they would see me as an "illegal immygrant" - the CHEEK! I'm well within my rights to be here but Mama says my ears are to big and my body too furry. One whiff of me and they would have to move out. I understand. Whoever is doing the inspek-shun is racist toward the Ethnic Bunneh. I would pee in their shoes if i could. *thump*

Thursday, 19 June 2008

Daddy STINKS and Mama is cross!

It's been me and Mama all night, daddy went out for a "werks fing" at 7pm. At 12.30 Daddy rings the bell like "BUUUUUUUZZZZZZZZZZZZ" for ages and it made Mama very cross as the noise will disturb other people. She stood at the door for aaaages for him, I raced along to see what was keeping him.... He was acting so strange! all slow and wibbly and talking nonsense! And he STANK of a funny smell i never smelled with my nose before!

Mama said he'd "been out drunking" or something and her face was not smiley like it usually is. It took her 20 minutes to get him to bed and she was saying words that made me cover my ears with my paws as she tried to get his clothes off. I jumped on him and Mama tried to take a photo but he really smelled so bad in my nose that i jumped straight off. pooey!

Mama had to get a bowl to wedge under his head and he was making wierd noises and stuffs was coming out of his mouth. I know it wasn't weewee because we do peepee out of our dinkles, everyone knows that! The noise was horrible and the smell.... yuk!

Mama was very cross and told me "he should know his limits at his age" and he will get a talking too in the morning. She can talk to him as long as I get my morning pellets, that's the mostest importantist of things!

She says she is going to have to stay awake all night to check that he doesn't die. It means I get to stay up extra late which is AWESOME! He should get drunked more often!

I better go and give her some cuddles so she turns her frown upside down!

Wednesday, 18 June 2008

Today was a very busy day.

I was doing lots of helpings with Mama today, there was so very much to be getting on with. Mama was changing and moving things, taking out draws, pushing them around, I therefore had to get in and chin everything for her, aswell as run through all the dusty patches that Mammy told me not too. She made a big space in the spare room by putting somethings into her bedroom, I told her where to put the things to make sure everything was present and correct and look right because these hoomins don't have a clue how to do stuffs.

Then it was snoozy time, followed by eating and pooping..... then some more eating and pooping followed by some binkies for Daddy. He was doing some "fweelance" things and was not paying me enough atten-shuns to I kept getting on the sofa every 2 minutes to annoy him!

I finished my evening by destroying a cardboard box and having cuddles with Mama. I'm very sleepy now, nighty night!

Tuesday, 17 June 2008

I likes my routine, I do.

I'm not fussy, but I do like things in a certain order, I'm all about routine see. When Mama gets up, I expect to be let out as soon as she has had a glass of water and I expect 5 pellets as an appetiser to my main salad meal that I expect pronto.

I do like to make a mess when I have my morning salad just to give the hoomins something to do.







nomnomnomnomnom!

One of my other favourite routines is when Mama has a shower. I'll be munching on some hay and all f a sudden "whoosh" I hear the shower go on so I race down to the bathroom. I have to cover my eyes with my ears when Mama takes her pyjamas off, I'm a gentleman so I don't stare at naked ladies...... though I did notice her legs are nearly as furry as me. Maybe she is turning into a bunny?

Mama has to take some clothes out of the washing basket for me and makes a pile that I like to play in while she showers. I can't help but get so excited I go binky crazy, throwing t-shirts here there and everywhere. I give them a little dig and a bite but i'm oh-so very gentle so I don't put holes in things.

After all this excitement, I have to go for a sleepy in the lounge. It's tiring being and excitable little bunny like me, you know!

Monday, 16 June 2008

Daddy made me a new signature!

I'm simply not being naughty enough, if i was Daddy would not have made me this -











I simply must try harder!!

I really am a horror!

I've been a whole bundle of naughtiness this past weekend! The hoomins were both very cross with me and spoke to me in grumbly voices to let me know that they weren't happy.

On Saturday morning Mama lifted me onto the hoomins sleeping place for snuggles which was real nice but I really wasn't enjoying the overpowering hoomin smell so I hopped over to Daddy's side of the bed and managed to squeeze out a little bit of pee before Mama began shrieking and shooed me off the bed. She said she wasn't happy because she is so tired with her hy-per-somni-doo-dah but had to get up and wash the duvet and strip the bed. Like I care!

Later on when the duvet was back on the back, I sneaked into the bedroom and onto the bed, I did the biggest wee on the duvet again! And I saved some for the mattress too, hahaahahahahha!

I'm so full of naughtiness and I just don't care!

Here's me being all cute on my sofa. Don't worry though, I peed on it the same day!

Friday, 13 June 2008

Well, Mama and I just had a heart to heart. She found me sobbing in the corner, my little ears catching the tears. She says I have nothing to worry about and that she is working on a little surprise for me! A surprise indeed! I now feel really rather silly getting myself so worked up! I was right off my coriander this morning.

I still don't understand why I will need to be banned from the spare room though. She said something about making the area clean and fresh and scent-free. Why would she do this? Of course I like clean and fresh but scent free?! I don't think so! I've spent alot of time chinning all my things in there, it's going to be a nightmare doing it all over again!

Mama says to expect Daddy to be in a very silly mood later, she says he is buying a new car, a tree-emm-wubbletoo or something? She says I will look uber cool going to see Simon the Vet and that I will need some sunglasses! She's so silly!

Mama is just piling me up some fresh hay, must dash, got to go jump on her back so she can't stand up or move1 I'm such a comedian!

Thursday, 12 June 2008

Today Mama was doing lots of "Um"s and "Ah"s in the spare room. She had a something she called a tay-p measuuure. I was helping out, bouncing around and she was saying that I will be banned from going in the room for a while in the next few weeks... what does she mean?! Does she realise how much stuff in there I own? does she not realise how long it takes me to chin everything in the room every day?!

I don't know what she's playing at so I peed on the sofa to show my disgust. This is my place, she can't be banning me willy nilly from rooms because she feel like it, who does she think she is?

These hoomins, what's wrong with them??!

Hmmmm...

Mama has been acting sooo strange for the last 24 hours! She keeps doing silly dancing, singing and doing more Circles Of Love around me than usual! When she sings, she goes "Uuuuuuuno! Uuuuuuuno!" What on earth is she going on about?

I showed my disapproval at her singing by weeing on the sofa. I made sure I did this while she had gone to the toilet, and I was back on the floor when she returned. I'm a clever bunny because I know she can't scald me if she doesn't catch me committing the crime! These two foots think they are very clever but really, they are so dumb!

Mama did a wash today and there was a big pile of Mama's pants on the floor, I threw them around! I hate girl pants, all those silly colours and lace twimmings! I gave them a dig too, I like a little dig now and then but I'm not a big digger, I'm far to lazy.

Mama is doing her silly drawing again, she's been doing them most nights, they look nice, they are sumfing to do with hearts but they don't look like hearts to me. Silly hoomins.

Mama and Daddy were whispering about me moving! What does this mean? Am I being rehomed?! Don't they love me anymore? I don't understand! I broke up this terrible conversations by throwing some binkies into the mix and the two-foots went "ahhhhh" and forgot all about the bad things they were saying. I hope they don't want me to move out, I like it here!

I'll never wee on the sofa again, I pwomise!

Mama said that a lady called Jane is excited to read my blog, her Broad Bean is broken and she can't read it yet. I'm going to send her lots of bunny kisses when she gets to read it! If Mama makes me move out, I'm going to ring Jane!

Monday, 9 June 2008

look at these funny bunnies!

here is my friend Alvin doing an excited dance with his ladybun Pearl, it makes my Mama laugh so much.



I wish when me and Daddy did womantic darn-sing it was more fun like this! :-D

Daddy was real nice!

Last night Daddy went out to play his drummy drums and got home real late but still found time to make me a new signature, isn't he nice?

I said I wanted it to have rice an' peas on it and he came up with this -








He is so clever.

Mama said the Alvin kissed his teeth at his Mom, that's so funny. He's such a rude bwoy, he's mi bredrin, bruthas gotta stick together!

There's is a funny video of Alvin and Pearl getting excited about their veggies, Mama say it makes her laugh, I might ask their Mom if I can put it up on my blog for Mama to see!

Sunday, 8 June 2008

Mama has not been a happy bunny today! Naughty daddy was snoring all night long and was disturbing Mama so much that she kept getting up and didn't sleep a wink all night! I liked it because it meant I could stay up all night like a naughty boy!

Today has been a lazy day, Mama did her sleeping in the morning after I had my pellets and she had Frosties (why can't i have Frosties? they look nice!) then we shared a plate of herbs. Mama said she was pretending to share so I understand what will happen when I have a ladybun. Why should I have to share my herbs? Mama makes them for me! I'll give any lady the what-for if she attempts to munch my herbs! *thump*

Saturday, 7 June 2008

Today it's been me and Mama for most of the day. Daddy got up early for a Saturday, I was surprised and excited to come out so early on a Saturday! He went out and it was me and Mama until 7pm. She said he'd gone to watch cars with his hoomin Daddy at Silverstone. I don't know what Silverstone is but I know that's where my mate Bobbin came from. I asked Mama if he'd gone to see Bobbin's family, she told me he would be driving a car! Can you imagine! A bun driving a car! If Mama says that's what Bobbin was doing I believe her. Then Daddy sent her words through the wind that wrote themselves on the little box she puts next to her ear. It said this -


















Wow! Bobbin is a Formula Bun Driver! He's so cool!



















This evening I've been wowing Mummy with how confident I am on the laminate floor, I race around with ease but I like to keep my binkies to my mat and runs, I don't slip around then! She says I'm such a funny buns, she's not wrong!

Thursday, 5 June 2008

Goshums, I'm the naughtiest bunny I know!

Tee hee, tonight I did a piddle on mummy's lap! haha! a man wot I do not remember came in the house and I was very suspicious of all the different smells that he bought in. I felt I needed to let him know that mummy is mine so hands off! I made my feelings known and mummy did a big squeal and daddy picked me up and told me off! how rude of the silly two foot! Daddy made me go to my bedroom for a while as punishment but I don't care, there's lots of hay there for me to eat, nummers!

Mummy says I look like a seal pup... what is a seal pup?

Wednesday, 4 June 2008

Mama is a meany!

So it's Wednesday and I'm thinking about the weekend, I fancy another lads night out at the Burrow Bar, last weekend was a blast.

I ask Mama real nicely if I can go out and she says "No, you were much to naughty last week"... I don't know what she's talking about! She did discuss it with Jack last week, you can see what happened here. (from post 13) I really wasn't as drunk as she says I was... there's no way I wet the bed.... is there.....?

hahahahahaha, look at me! on the sofa, where I shouldn't be! hahahahhahahaha!


Tuesday, 3 June 2008

Tee Hee, I've been naughty! yay!

Last night I was having a good run around, giving everything a right good chinning so those darned two foots know everything belongs to moi. Mama was laughing because she said I was being so cute and silly. Well, you know, with a face like mine, I can't help but be cute!

Mama got up today and went to put a wash on, silly two foot had left the next lot of washing on the floor beside the washing basket so being the naughty rascal I am, I did a great big piddle on the washing! There was a puddle on the floor that might have given the game away but Mama walked past with the washing for the machine and didn't say anything so I guess she didn't notice.... No doubt I'll be doing it again in the future. I'm such a cheeky rascal. I love to wee where I shouldn't! Silly two foots.

I just had a real good run around, now I'm pooped!

Monday, 2 June 2008

Hello to all my bunny and hoomin friends! My two foot has helped my set up this blog so I can keep you all informed as to what naughtiness I've been up too!

I suppose I should really start with a little background on myself. My two foot pretends that I'm a bit of a Jamaican rude boy but in reality, I'm just a Northern lad, I was born in Leeds. My two foot thinks that I spent too much time studying the family cat, Bonkers, because I don't display usual rabbit behaviours.... though I do like to dig at a clean pile of clothes that are waiting to be ironed! I generally like to be sprawled out in the sunshine and eating. My favourite foods are coriander, mint, basil, thyme, lemon thyme, parsley, red pepper and cawwit. I love banana but my two foot says I can have it on a Sunday because it is bad for my teef, booooo!

I was neutered a couple of months ago and I took it all in my stride, my two foot says I'm a very brace boy. I like going to the vets because Simon is so very nice to me, he gives me lots of cuddles and says I'm a very relaxed bunny. Sometimes he sticks a big thing in my mouth and I'm not a big fan of that but I'm sure he's only doing it to keep me healthy.

My two foot has been telling me that soon she is going to build me a new home, that I need to move out of the converted warehouse bachelor pad and into a two up two down family home ready for when I start dating. I like my bachelor pad though! hmpf!

I like cuddles with my two foots, sometimes I have to groom them because they can be a bit grubby. I don't like it when I get told off for going on the sofa, I cover my eyes with my ears and pretend not to hear. I like to rearrange my apartment in the night, the two foots don't seem to realise I like my toilet at an angle, not flush to the corner like how they put it. Silly hoomins.

I think it's time for one to retire to the boudoir, the two foot just filled my hay ball and it's making my tummy rumble. Toddle pip!